February 12, 2024 Season 4 Episode 20
Minnesota, United States: Rosalind Loggin has endured more trials and tribulations in her life than many people could bear. But she finds a way to triumph over them. Her faith is her foundation and she feels called through her troubles to serve even the most challenging young people. She’s real, she’s determined, and she’s just what they need to turn their own troubles around.
Content warning: Some of the topics discussed may be difficult for some of you to hear. So, please take care of yourself.
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Rosalind Loggin
For some people who feel like they don't have nobody, and I can get on their level and understand them and overlook their challenges and not judge them. I think, you know, by me being my true, authentic self, I'm not going to judge you because I know that we all come from different walks of life, from different stages, and different things like that. People will like people that's gonna be real with them. People already know that they're making a mistake, you know, when they're making a mistake, and so we don't need people to remind us of that. And a lot of times we do that.
Paul Meunier
Hello, I'm Paul Meunier, the executive director of the Youth Intervention Programs Association, and I'm a youth worker at heart. How lucky am I, I have the privilege to meet youth workers from around the globe and learn their stories and share them with the entire world. I'm glad you're listening because together we'll learn how their life experiences shape their youth work. As you listen, I encourage you to consider how your experiences shape what you have to offer young people. Welcome to this edition of The Passionate Youth Worker. Hi, everybody, it's dawned on me that I've never formally thanked you, the faithful listeners of this show. So, I want to do that now. Thank you for listening. I'm sincerely humbled that so many of you regularly tune in. Truth be told, I'm not very comfortable at sharing success. But we've got some pretty cool things happening here. Did you know this show has become more than just a podcast? We've become a global community. I've recently discovered that this podcast is rated in the top 10% of podcasts globally by Listen Notes. And according to Feedspot, we hold the title of the top-rated podcast for youth workers. Our show has reached 100 different countries across all continents. I never dreamt we would have this reach or impact when we first came up with the idea. This podcast is really a YIPA team effort and we have no plans to stop soon or rest on our success. Please help us spread the word about The Passionate Youth Worker podcast. Share it with your coworkers, friends or family members, or just anyone who cares about our young people. It would mean the world to me, and it will help our young people too, which is what brings us all together anyways. Okay, enough with that. On to the episode. Today we're in for an inspiring conversation featuring the incredible Rosalind Loggin from Minnesota here in the United States. Renowned for her remarkable ability to connect with even the toughest young people, Rosalind attributes her gift to a higher power. In a remarkably candid manner, she'll open up about the challenging journey she's faced, turning adversity into strength. Through numerous traumatic experiences, Rosalind remains resilient, and her unwavering spirit shines through. Affectionately known as the boss lady, she radiates charisma and leadership. As you listen to Rosalind's story, you'll discover how she views life's hardships not as obstacles but as transformative milestones that have shaped the empowered, compassionate youth worker she is today. Are you ready for an uplifting conversation that proves resilience, faith, and a positive mindset can triumph over any adversity? I know I am. And I'm excited to get going. But just a quick warning, some of the things we'll discuss today may be difficult for some of you to hear. So, please keep that in mind. And please take care of yourself. Rosalind, thank you for joining us on The Passionate Youth Worker podcast.
Rosalind Loggin
Thank you for having me, Paul.
Paul Meunier
We have so much to cover in such a very short time. So, I'm going to cut right to the chase. Rosalind, what was your childhood like? What are some of your early memories?
Rosalind Loggin
Some of my early memories were how my work began with youth. It was me taking care of my younger brother who has epilepsy seizures and hypertension and different things like that. And it's, you know, during the time that I was caring for him, it seemed like it was like I was kind of like pissed, you know, like my mom made me watch this kid but then it grew into a passion because I've seen that a lot of people didn't have patience to deal with children who had certain disabilities and seizures and different things like that. And so, that's where my journey began.
Paul Meunier
Yeah. And so that connection with your brother certainly started the shaping of your care and concern for other people. And maybe some of the other people that have it less as good as you do. What were your parents like? Were you raised with your mom and dad and siblings or...
Rosalind Loggin
I was raised with my mom and my dad, we were together in our earlier years, but my dad's he stayed in my life. My mom, you know, she divorced my father. And it was my stepdad. And so, me and my brothers and sisters, we had a lot of challenges. You know, like we were, you know, like, my dad was a firm father, he was from Mississippi, so he was really firm. And so we it was like, you know, if he said something, we kind of like jumped. But the things that I know now, you know, looking back over those times, he child-reared us in a way that he knew how to rear us. But then when my mother left my father, she met my stepdad. And that was not a pretty sight.
Paul Meunier
Yeah. What was that situation like? What was the deal with your stepdad?
Rosalind Loggin
It was like a dog's house, molestation, you know, my stepfather still, you know, started messing with me sexually. And I started running away, as you know, as a teen. So, it seemed like I just went from one form of abuse to the next, you know. It's like I went from trauma in the home and then trauma in relationships. My older two children's father was very abusive, you know, and he came from, you know, drugs, a family with drug and alcohol and different things like that. I ran away with him, and I got pregnant. And so, I got pregnant at 15. And I had my daughter at 16. So, it was just like, I felt like I was robbed out of my childhood. So, I'm help raising my little brother, then to have a stepfather, you know, mess with me. And then to have my father, mother and father, our home dysregulated and so and just, it was just, I feel like it just spiraled down, downward.
Paul Meunier
Yeah. And somehow here you are today, helping other people experiencing the same thing. How old were you when all this started? I mean, were you just in your early childhood or teenage years or?
Rosalind Loggin
When my little brother and I, he's ten years older than me. My mom was having, as my mom was in the hospital having my brother, my stepfather was taking my virginity. So, about 10.
Paul Meunier
Oh man.
Rosalind Loggin
So, kind of yeah.
Paul Meunier
And what did, at that time, I can't imagine what that was like. And first of all, I'm sorry, that that happened to you.
Rosalind Loggin
Thank you.
Paul Meunier
What were you thinking, was it just bitterness and anger or confusion or sorrow?
Rosalind Loggin
I think it was a combination of all of you know, I could aware, you know, as I stated, my, my stepfather started molesting me around by the age of 10. But as far as back I can remember, I have had a stepbrother, who, you know, he did some things to me when I was even younger than that. You know, so when you deal with trauma and different things like that, you can kind of, I kind of like disassociate. And so, I kind of, like, blocked it. So, it's like, it'd be things that you don't want to remember. So, you know, like, okay, like, is this normal? And I think some of the things that I experienced then is still affecting me in my life today, if that makes sense. And so, it's, it's like, Aah. So, I call it triggers, and trauma, trauma and triggers, you know. So, certain things that, you know, like when I walk back into like, an unfamiliar place, I cringe., And so, for me now at the age of 51, and learning how to, you know, to get the help that I need for myself in therapy and where I can to help other people, you know, like, we didn't, we didn't cause these things to happen to us. And so it is help out there. And so, I've learned over the years to really clearly set boundaries.
Paul Meunier
I gotta imagine it's taken a lot of strength to get to where you are today. Some of the things you've gone through clearly would cripple a lot of people and make it really difficult or they would be angry or abusive themselves or engaged in some sort of self-harm behavior because they just didn't cope with it. Somehow you figured out how to do it. At what point in your life were you able to come to the understanding that I have to get away or I have to start thinking differently about this otherwise, it's not going to turn out very good for me?
Rosalind Loggin
Well, you know, I'm a dreamer. I dream. You know, God, God bless us all with different gifts. And so I dream. I had a dream that a guy that I was dealing with he that I was dating, I had a dream that he had messed with my son. In reality, he had messed with my daughter. And it was so, it scared him but it's like, I was just like, not really understanding, like at the age because I think I was like, 21 I had a nervous breakdown. I did have a breakdown. You know so it's like, when you relive certain things it's like, oh my God, you know. So, he really don't know how to handle those things. And so, the way I handled it, now I would have been very protective of my children like since day one. I didn't have a lot of different people around my children, if people did come around my children. My kids used to say that I was mean but now that I look back over I know why. You know like I'm protecting them from other people from hurting them. So, but I had to learn better skills in doing that as well.
Paul Meunier
When you had this dream, and you realized that something bad has happened to your daughter, is that the point where you sought out help and started to figure out, I need a better way to cope with this so that I can get past this really tough time that I'm going through?
Rosalind Loggin
That was the beginning, you know, because I'm like, doing like I say, I had a breakdown. And then I met my second set of children's father. And you know, and I got saved, you know, I started going to church. And so I think, with the help of God, you know, I think that's what really just kind of like turned my life around. But it was still different traumas, you know, but not to the extent. I just kept my children away from dangerous situations where I thought, you know, as far as me thinking. But I've ran my own daycare for 11 years. And so, sometimes things slip in, but I was just very cautious, you know, like, just not allowing certain things to, even when it came down to my, I call them my daycare babies. When it came down to my daycare babies, I'm like, no, like, like, No. It was certain things that I didn't tolerate, you're not gonna do this. And so even my daycare babies thought I was mean. But now looking back, when you know, when some of them were in their middle 20s and they called, they still call me my nickname is Sue, Miss Sue, when you was younger, I just thought you was the meanest lady. But now I get it you know. Like, you know, so all of them calling me back asking for help and information because they see that, I really care because I'm like, No, you're not. And I gave it to them in the raw, I didn't hide nothing from them. Like they're like, No, you know, like, if you do, obviously, you know, if you don't do this, this, that, you're just gonna be stuck with a baby. And so, and those were the type of words that my mom told to me. So, if you're taught a certain way, you gonna deliver it a certain way. And so, but now lately, I'm trying to really learn how to consider my audience, because everybody can't take the directness.
Paul Meunier
Yeah.
Rosalind Loggin
But they want real. And so, you know, they come back and like, the way you told me, they was like, I couldn't understand it now. But the way you told me now that I'm older, I understand what you was trying to tell me.
Paul Meunier
Yeah, you're full of charisma and I can imagine you say it the way it is. And sometimes that's what our young people need to hear, especially our young people that maybe aren't making great choices, right? They need to, they need to have a dose of reality to set in about what might happen if they don't change. I think it's really interesting that you were so focused with your brother and his epilepsy and really cared for him. And then you started a daycare. And my understanding, when we got to know each other a little bit, you said, these were some tough kids that you brought into your daycare.
Rosalind Loggin
Oh my God, they were what you would call the throwaway kids. Didn't no daycare centers want them. And I took them and I had the patience with them. So, like I say, you know, a lot of their parents still call me right now to this day like, Miss Sue, you know, can you can you come help me with such and such and if he call you don't, you know, don't answer, you know, because he need to learn this way. And he need to learn that way. And so, a lot of my families still are in connection with me.
Paul Meunier
That is really special. What do you think gave you that strength, despite all the things you're coping with yourself, and just trying to deal with the difficulties we face and there's more that we haven't even talked about. But what gives you the foresight to think my answer to helping all this is to give back to other people? Because that's what you did and it seems like it's given you strength. somehow.
Rosalind Loggin
It gives me strength, it also gave me joy. I didn't know that, you know, I was a caregiver enabler, you know, and different things like that, you know, that's what a lot of people say, No, you shouldn't help this person, you know, you shouldn't help that person. But for some people who feel like they don't have nobody, and I can get on their level, understand them and overlook their challenges and not judge them. I think, you know, by me being my true authentic self, that's how they'll, you know, open to having like, let me call Miss Ross you know, because I know she got the answer for me. I'm not gonna judge you because I know that we all come from different walks of life, from different stages, and different things like that. And people will like people, that's gonna be real with them. Although people already know that they're making a mistake, you know, when they're making a mistake. And so, we don't need people to remind us of that. And a lot of times we do that.
Paul Meunier
Good point and well said. Believe it or not, we have to take a short break. But when we come back, I want to start asking you how all these things in your life have influenced who you are today. So, we'll be right back.
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Paul Meunier
Rosalind, right before the break, I hinted that I'd like to talk to you about these experiences that you've gone through. What big lesson have you learned from all this? There must be some underlying theme that you've learned along the way, is there something like that?
Rosalind Loggin
I believe that it's Beauty for Ashes. And I believe also that the things that I went through in my life I had to go through in order for me to help somebody else. And I believe that that was it was just a life lesson. And no, it wasn't fair, it isn't fair. But I believe that, you know, like, if you can take that negative and take it into a positive so that you could at least just pull one person out of a rut, you know, it'll make the world a much better place.
Paul Meunier
So, those experiences make you who you are today. And I think you like yourself, it sounds like you're very happy and content with who you are as a person. That seems to come through pretty clear. Do you wish life would have been different or are you content because it's made you who you are? I'm just wondering that big, deep question.
Rosalind Loggin
That could be a challenging question. It's a combination of both, you know, like, sometimes I don't understand, you know, why certain things happen. But then I also understand, like, you know, like, God chose me, you know. I feel like many are called, but only a few are chosen. And a lot of people couldn't go through the things that I went through. So, I believe that God, I was just considered.
Paul Meunier
Yeah, it's kind of like your calling to do this, right? And it was the purpose that you have to go through.
Rosalind Loggin
Yes.
Paul Meunier
What do you think your purpose is in life? Can you put that into words in some sort of capacity?
Rosalind Loggin
I think my purpose is to pull people out of dark places.
Paul Meunier
That's cool. Can you say more about that? That's really cool.
Rosalind Loggin
A lot of times people deal with depression and sometimes they stay in it because they think it's their fault when it's really not their fault. Because outsiders looking in, you know, like, we both look normal today. Yeah, but don't nobody know what goes on behind closed doors. A lot of times people just come up and start a conversation to be like, Oh my God, you know, God sent you to me. You know, it was meant for me to meet you, you know, I'm walking through this, or I'm walking through that. And so, I've just believed that your gifts make room for you know. He has sent the people that you need to serve and witness to and the people that you need to help. And so, my goal was like, I'm working in school now. And it's like, oh my God, it's like, this young guy, you know, whether it's female or male, it's like, oh my God, just see, he's going through, like the foster care system and, and different things like that. And I'm like, oh my God, I just, he's a hardened vessel. A lot of people push him away when he's crying out, you know? And so, it's like, how can we say we really here helping people if we scared of them, or if we shun them, or put them down or different things? How can we how can we help them?
Paul Meunier
That's the thing that I think about you the most. You've gone through so much, that nothing probably, well, I say this kind of lightly but you're probably able to handle a lot because you've been through a lot.
Rosalind Loggin
Yes.
Paul Meunier
And so, you're willing to work with the young people that maybe seem so difficult and behaviorally challenging, but you're able to look past that and go this young person is just screaming for help.
Rosalind Loggin
Yes.
Paul Meunier
And how do I go about connecting with them? Is that right, am I seeing that correctly?
Rosalind Loggin
It is because I was, I was talking to my sister and I was sharing about my student that I'm working with. She was like, Yo, you better watch, you know, you. And I was like, no, I said no. I said, I believe I was sent there to help him because so many people reject him. And one thing about a person, if they already going through different things and people are rejecting them, they are going to lash out to see how long you gonna be consistent and stick it out with them. And so I'm like, you know, like, you know, he, he tried me today. It was it was it was a challenge. And I'm like, I said, okay, but I gotta go back, you know, you know, I'll go back until I know that my assignment is over. Because I believe I'm sent on assignments.
Paul Meunier
That's cool. How do you know, Rosalind, how can you tell when you've made a connection with the young person, when you've cracked through that hard exterior, and you go, this young person is trusting me and is gonna listen to me?
Rosalind Loggin
When they start opening up, you know, and sharing, you know, the deepest, dark secrets in their life. You know, they can open up like, you know, some of the students tell me about their moms and you know, they don't have that relationship, or some of them tell me that, you know, like, they're in an abusive relationship. And so I think, you know, then I can lead them to where it is that they need to be. Because some of the situations I can't fix and some of them I won't even to try to. If I know I can't fix them, I recommend to somebody else that can fix them, or get them the help that they need.
Paul Meunier
You know, this boss lady title that some of the people call you, that is exactly what some of our toughest young people need, right? They need somebody who's going to hang in there, and maybe be more straightforward and to the point and stick with them. I think you're so good at that. Do you find like, some subset of young people really just are attracted to your style of dealing with young people?
Rosalind Loggin
I think they're attracted to my style. I think once they get to know me and know that it's genuine, that's when they, you know, oh, you know, I can open up with her, you know, because I know, she's gonna you know. Because it's not much that they try to pull it over on me. And it's not that I don't see it. But I'm like, I usually say been there, you know, being there, done that, you know. So, like, how is it that...I've already been there you trying to tell me how to do it, when I've already done that. And so, I just, you know, go along with them. And then I just unleash on them. I'm like, no, this is not how you, this is not how we're going to do this thing. You know, like, you need to do A, B, C, D, or E.
Paul Meunier
Do you think a lot of your life experiences have shaped you to have that skill set?
Rosalind Loggin
Yes, yes. I was, like I say, I was I pretty much basically was a mother at 10. And then I became with my little brother, and then I had because even with my brothers and sisters, you know, I pretty much knew okay, like, know, they used to call me Mama Sue, my nickname is Sue, so Mama Sue. And so then, when I had my baby at 15, everything just stopped. You know, I don't get the chance to party, I don't get the chance to do none of those things. And those are the things that my mom told me, You gonna take care of that baby, you laid down, you had that baby, you gonna take care of that baby. And I did just that.
Paul Meunier
Yeah. What was that like, being a young teenage mother? Did you find joy and happiness in it or did it seem like something you wish wouldn't have happened, or both of those things?
Rosalind Loggin
I love being a mom. I mean, I didn't really have contact with my oldest children's father and so, I was a single mom, you know, I was in went from one broken relationship to the next, you know, so it's like, Oh, my goodness. And so even like, now I'm like, okay, well, I'm scared to date because can't nobody relate. So, where it's not that I'm aggressive, but I'm just, you know, very assertive. I'm just not going to accept anything, you know, I'm not going to say no, I was married 15 years to my ex-husband, and he was alcoholic. My kids mother passed away and so I raised them. It's like, it was just things that I was not gonna allow my children to go through. And the children who came across my path, if they was on my watch, I was not gonna allow them to go through it neither.
Paul Meunier
You shared a lot of the experiences you had as a young person, and even as an adult, you've gone through a lot. What do you think the biggest challenge in your life has been and how has that shaped who you are today?
Rosalind Loggin
One of my biggest challenges, you know, is when we had our initial interview, I mentioned how my son, myself that my daughter, nine times almost killed her. He was on PCP and dealing with mental health challenges. My daughter had to have a feeding tube, a trach, and plastic surgery. And during that time, I was just like, I couldn't understand, you know, I'm just like, and I get teary-eyed. Yeah. because I'm like, oh, my God, these are both my children, you know, like, how do I separate the two? And so it was this guy, I'm a security officer and this guy came onto my post one day, he said he was a deacon at a church. And he asked me, I said, no, I asked him, I said it's something that I really just cannot understand. I said, I don't know why my son stabbed my daughter. And then he said, this is what made me just kind of like find peace with the situation, he said, your daughter's gonna live and your son's gonna get the help that he needs. My son got 20 years in prison and my daughter's living. So, as long as they still have breath in they body, you know that we all still have a chance to get it right. And so, that was just one of my hardest challenges that I have had to face as a mother.
Paul Meunier
I think about your life and to be honest with you, I'm absolutely enthralled with how well you've been able to cope, and what a strong person you are. And the fact that you give back to other people in the way that you do, and in the manner you do is just impressive. And so, I just was wondering, is there anything else as we come to the end that I should have asked you that I didn't, that you'd like the listeners to know?
Rosalind Loggin
I just know that we all you know, we all go through our trials and tribulations and that when we can learn how to forgive others and forgive ourselves for allowing certain things to transpire. You know, like, I show so many people so much grace. But sometimes I don't show myself that. And so, I'm learning how to be kind to myself. And so, I think when we learn how to be kind to ourselves, we can overcome any obstacle and challenges because God's a forgiving guy, you know. And so, I just feel like certain things happen so that we can learn how to forgive and move on. It's not to say that we should always embrace or invite our accusers in. No, I'm not saying that. But I'm just saying you'd like to just to be free within ourselves, you know, so that we can be free to do the job that God called us to do. Because it's, this is a job. And I always say it's a scripture in the Bible, it says that the harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. It's only a few of us out here that's really trying to do a good job. A lot of times, we find people in this field of work, you know, just so that they can make money. But if you really do not have the heart, I say, you know, like, don't mess somebody else's life up. Because you have to have compassion and have a heart to do this type of work. And it's challenging, and rewarding.
Paul Meunier
Without question. I'm firm believer that our life experiences define who we are. And it defines how we support our young people. I don't think we can separate the people we've been with the experiences we have, and the way we support young people. We have to bring that into our work with young people, and take what we've learned along the way, and help shape that life of a young person in a way that is going to help them grow into the person that they ought to be. And I think that it takes all different kinds of people to do this work. It takes some people to be straightforward and bold and to be confrontive of young people. And it takes more empathetic soft people for other young people. And I have to tell you, I am just grateful that you did all the work you did for young people in the past. And I know what you're going to do for them going forward. And I just truly feel blessed that you told the story to our audience because they now can see that no matter what life throws at you, you can overcome it. It's possible you're proven a living legend of being able to overcome what life throws at you. So, thank you for the work you've done. And thank you for being a guest on the podcast.
Rosalind Loggin
Thank you.
Paul Meunier
Rosalind, before we go, I always like to give the guest the last word. So, what words of wisdom or inspiration would you like to leave with our listeners today?
Rosalind Loggin
Just continue on the path. If there's certain things that you don't understand, just ask God or whoever your higher power is to be your guide, and just stay on the path. Don't give up.
Paul Meunier
If you would like to share your passion for youth work, we'd love to spotlight you as a guest. If you have feedback about the show, please let us know. Just visit training.yipa.org, that's training.yipa.org and click on the podcast tab. This podcast is made possible in part due to a generous contribution from M Health Fairview. I'm your host, Paul Meunier. Thanks for listening to The Passionate Youth Worker.